When I was in my early teens, raising as much hell as I could without getting into SERIOUS trouble, my mom gave me a framed copy of the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling. I guess I really didn’t think much of it, but I hung it on my bedroom wall in the basement anyway. At 17 I ‘ran away’ to the Air Force and left it hanging there on the wall, guarding the rest of my childhood stuff.

Two years later, while home on leave, mom summoned me to my basement hideaway and lifted Rudyard from the wall. “I know this doesn’t mean much to you,” she said. “But I’d like you to take it with you, because in my eyes you’ve really turned out to be a man.”

Those were the most memorable words ever spoken to me. I wanted to apologize for all of the trouble I’d caused growing up, but you know how moms are. The look in her eyes said no apology was necessary.

Thanks mom. I still have that print. It’s followed me throughout my travels.It’s been through several frames – after being broken in several moves or swapped out to match the decor – but it’s always wherever I am.

While placing it in a new frame recently, this memory came flooding back and prompted this blog post.

“If” by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you.
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat these two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

Thanks again, mom. That’s a tall order, but I’m doing the best I can.

PEACE.
Rick

You really can’t quote me on this one because I didn’t write it. However, I’ve had it memorized since  junior high and it has served this optimist well.

I never knew who the author was by until I looked it up recently. Now, in my head, it’s a JEOPARDY! question…

“I’ll take LITTLE KNOWN POETS for $2,000, Alex.”

“His poem ’The Man Who Thinks He Can’ appeared in a 1965 collection titled,  ’Poems That Live Forever.’”

BEEP-BEEP… “Rick?”

“Who is Walter D. Wintle, Alex?”

“Yes! and… oh, the sound you just heard signals the end of the Double JEAPARDY! round. You can put down your signaling buttons.”

OKAY! WAKE UP!… Of course this visualization ends with me having a runaway lead and breaking the all-time JEOPARDY! record for consecutive wins. I’m seriously thinking about trying out one day. In the mean time, I’m the reigning JEOPARDY! champion in my living room.

This poem; the Boy Scout motto, oath and law and a bunch of songs from Mary Poppins and Ray Charles are a few of my lasting memories from childhood. Just thought I’d share.

The Man Who Thinks He Can

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don’t.
If you’d like to win, but think you can’t
It’s almost a cinch you won’t

If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost,
For out in the world you’ll find
Success begins with a fellow’s will;
It’s all in the state of mind.

If you think you’re outclassed, you are.
You’ve got to think high to rise.
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.

Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can.

Walter D. Wintle, “The Man Who Thinks He Can.” – Poems That Live Forever, comp. Hazel Feldman 1965.

PEACE.
Rick

I am an eternal optimist. I see the glass as half full. I am always doing great. And it’s always a beautiful day… And I find that’s a bit much for some people. It’s especially annoying to those who like to complain, point out the negative, gossip, see the glass as half empty and are forever having a bad day.

Recently, I felt the need to explain my sunny attitude to someone (who shall remain nameless) after telling them in no uncertain terms to “shut up and get the bleep out of my face with all the negative already, jeez!” Obviously I had reached a breaking point despite my efforts to deal with it in a more Zen-like manner.

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In my speaker coaching business I have a two-page document that spells out the rules of the road. It defines my professional relationship with the speaker, outlines our objectives, sets policy and assigns accountability. It’s brief but detailed, pretty serious and well thought out based on my experiences inside of coaching relationships.

However, upon seeing it a number of speakers have referred to it as ‘strict’ or ‘hard.’ I’m sure I’ve even discouraged a few prospective professional relationships based on similar reactions. The truth is, I’m not nearly that strict or hard when it comes to the real relationship and my usual response is, “The rules only apply if being a nice guy isn’t working.”

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